Just For Fun: A Guest Post about NerdHQ

Pictured from L-R: Jake Greene as Thor, Kat Carr as Wonder Woman, and Charity Edwards (the Blithe Bachelorette) as Wolverine

My friend and former roommate Kat and I got our geek on at San Diego Comic-Con this past weekend. She did some Gospel-centered processing about her experience and offered to write a guest post for me.

Her thoughts aren’t specifically about singleness, but they sure can apply. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do.


Last weekend I attended an off-site event at San Diego Comic-Con. (Yes, I am one of those people.) The event is NerdHQ, put on by Zachary Levi. It was the 6th year for the event and my 5th year to attend. It’s this wonderful thing that happens alongside San Diego Comic-Con where Zac provides a free place for people with common interests to hang out and small “conversations” with celebrities for a small fee of $20. All the proceeds go to help out the charity Operation Smile. Over the years, I’ve gotten to sit on these “conversations” with some pretty big celebrities and have made some great friends through this event.

But the point of me writing (which I rarely ever do!) Read More

Just For Fun: Another Wedding Story

Photo credit: Margie Padelford

I coordinated another wedding on Friday, my fifth in less than two years. I love it. I love

  • everything about weddings.
  • being in charge of things.
  • looking pretty while being in charge of things.

Therefore, wedding coordinating gives me warm, happy, fuzzy feelings – and usually incredibly tired feet.

But this wedding – this one touched me, deep in the heart of my soul. (I know that’s cheesy, but stay with me here.)

It also wore me out physically, like way more than I expected. I literally gave blood, sweat, and tears* to this wedding, and I came home aching from the top of my sunburned hair part to the end of the toe that was smashed during dancing. Read More

My Roommate Life: Part 2

Photo credit: Noel Walker Photography

I’ve blogged a few times about how great my roommate is, and most people who know us have commented on how much we seem like a married couple. So I’ve been processing for a couple of months now how roommate-life is (and isn’t) like married life.

In Part 1, I talked about how having a close roommate is like having a spouse. And in Part 2 (this post), I’m talking about how it’s very much not like having a spouse.


When people first meet Nicole and me, they chuckle and make jokes about how we seem married. But when they really get to know us, it’s way obvious that we aren’t.

On the surface

Of course, there are the glaring differences between us and married couples. Obviously, we don’t have sex, children, a joint bank account, or the same room. We don’t know how much money the other makes, we lay claim to (some of the) food in the fridge, and we’re not on each other’s car insurance policies.

So there’s that, but there’s also the dynamic of us Read More

My Roommate Life: Part 1

I’ve blogged a few times about how great my roommate is, and most people who know us have commented on how much we seem like a married couple. So I’ve been processing for a couple of months now how roommate-life is (and isn’t) like married life.

In Part 1 (this post), I’ll talk about how having a close roommate is like having a spouse. And in Part 2, I’ll talk about how it’s very much not like having a spouse.


How we met

Nicole and I have a mutual friend, and back in the day, this mutual friend would talk to Nicole about me – and to me about Nicole. For years, Nicole and I were separately jealous of how much our mutual friend talked about her other friend. Yet, for years, we didn’t meet each other.

In 2009, our mutual friend got married, and Nicole and I were both bridesmaids in the wedding. We spent about 36 hours together in which we were focused more on the bride than each other, and I promptly forgot about Nicole as she and I went back to our respective cities after the wedding.

In 2012, I told our mutual friend Read More

My Belief in “The One”

I’m just gonna come out and say it now, in case anyone is wondering: I believe in “The One.”

You know, the idea that there’s only one man in the world who is right for me to marry, only one potential Mr. Charity? My sisters have tried to talk me out of it, my friends have tried to reason me out of it, and many, many bloggers have written against it. But I truly, romantically, deeply believe there’s only one man (if any) I should marry.

I generally blame/attribute this belief to three things:

  1. Disney

Cinderella and Prince Charming. Sleeping Beauty and Prince Phillip. Belle and the Beast. Lady and the Tramp. These are the stories I grew up on, in a household where my parents called each other Read More

My Choice to be Single

I often, even on this blog, bemoan the fact that I’m single. I mean, there are good things about it, and I get to know Jesus in suffering and whatever. But it just occurred to me in the past couple of weeks (mostly because of a comment my dad made on a previous post – thanks, Dad) that I actually have chosen singleness. Do choose it. Am choosing it.

I kinda don’t like that. It’s easier to think of singleness as something that’s happening to me, something that has been chosen for me. I like to think that, if it were up to me, I would choose marriage and a family of my own. Yet, 33 years into this life, I have yet to make that choice.

For instance, when my best-ish guy friend asked me to be his girlfriend, I turned him down. More than once. When a guy I reconnected with after 10 years indicated that he might be interested in me as a future wife, I turned him down. Again. I’ve gone on dates only to firmly cut things off before the second date, and I’ve refused to give out my number to interested parties.

It’s not like this happens often. Read More

My Coffee Date Thoughts

A few weeks ago, I was meeting up with a friend for coffee after work. She got married last year, and I knew her before she was ever dating her husband. She and I were in the same accountability group at church, so I got to see the trepidation when a man (her now-husband) from church asked her out to breakfast the first time; the awkwardness of the first months of dating; the agony of waiting through trials before engagement.

I was there at the surprise engagement party, I bought her her first wedding magazine, I slaved over the wedding DIY, I agonized with her over the family drama that seemed unfair, and I dragged my roommates into the planning, whether they liked it or not. The planning of that wedding dictated my days, and I experienced “bride brain” for the first time. I blogged about the wedding itself last year.

In all that time, I had done well in not being envious as she and her groom in their early 20’s found each other and planned a wedding and experienced the first year of marriage – all things that I’ve wanted/craved for decades. In fact, I’d done so well that I took my joy for them for granted. Read More

My Level of Love

I ran across a blog post today, that definitely resonated with me. Several parts of it elicited some “Mmmm hmmm”s and “You go, girl”s.

The author, Joi Weaver, tells her story of being a 33-year-old who has never been kissed and shares the social struggles that accompany virginity. I blogged about virginity a couple of years ago, as well as some themes she highlights in her story.

For instance, here is one paragraph I can definitely relate to:

[Singleness is] not my preferred choice, but I’m not going to fling myself at someone out of desperation. This sense of acceptance comes and goes. There are days when I’m tempted to run outside and proposition the first man I can find. But most days, I just accept that this is my reality right now, and change will not happen quickly or easily. Regardless, the frustration lingers: I would have liked it to be a real choice, not a matter of mere acceptance.

(Even though I have had the chance to say, “Yes,” to a couple of different men who were interested in me, it still feels like I haven’t had a choice because those men were not good for me, nor I for them. It wasn’t a choice of singleness or a great marriage; it was a choice between singleness and a bad relationship – and therefore not much of a choice at all.)

Miss Weaver goes on to tell Read More

My Valentine’s Musings

I’ve blogged before about how much I love Valentine’s Day, but I don’t think I’ve mentioned how much I love my birthday. I love other people’s birthdays, too, but I LOVE my birthday. I celebrate all month.

Early in February, I threw a little birthday party for myself. I invited all my friends in San Diego to come to lunch on Super Bowl Sunday – after church, but before the game. I had 20-25 people RSVP, and I reserved tables at a local restaurant.

I know to hold RSVP’s loosely – especially in San Diego, and especially since most of the people on the guest list were from my old church (which is notoriously bad with RSVPs). But even I was surprised when only 10 people besides me showed up. Literally half of the people who said they were coming wound up not coming, and some of them didn’t even text to say sorry. They simply didn’t show. Read More